Fans to Distribute Eternal Wrath Upon Leyland, Peralta, Dotel For At Least One More Glorious Year


Ever wonder how serious Detroit fans are about their team? Well, wonder no more.

If you were to follow around local Detroit media and fans today, you know – in a non-stalkerish way, you would be completely shocked to discover later that the Detroit Tigers were at one point in the last week or two four wins away from a World Championship. Apparently, Dave Dombrowski is an imbecile,  Jim Leyland is more worried about how many cigarettes he can smoke than winning a baseball game, Jhonny Peralta is more expensive than Miguel Cabrera, and Octavio Dotel, well, he just flat out hates this city!

I swear, I’m not making these things up.

Caller John P from Ann Arbor on A Local Sports Radio Station Somewhere in Detroit, Michigan, U.S.A., North America.

“Look, I don’t know what Dombrowski thinks he’s doing. Only an imbecile would sign Prince Fielder, a baseball player who looks like he ate my kid, to play first base and hit fourth every single day for the next nine frickin’ years. Look what he did in the playoffs! Nothin’! Nothin! And do the Tigers run any medical tests at all to see if this guy can even play all year! No. Mr. Ilitch says win me a World Series and Dombrowski runs out and throws a bank at the guy who hits the most home runs out of any Free—-” 

At that point the call was cut off, but John P. certainly made his P. And to John P. if you somehow stumble across this, I’d apologize for using your words without permission but you’ve provided such rich content!

Comment from recent post

“Its blatantly obvious now that Smokey cant get a team ready for the world series. Hes more worried about where he is going to smoke than making sure his team is ready. Same as the St Louis series, a pathetic excuse for baseball. What a joke.”

Email from frequent critic

“…look, where do you get off defending Leyland all the —-ing time? I could manage this team better in my sleep, and even if I don’t know all the rules, at least I wouldn’t always be more worried about when I can get my next cancer stick injection and actually not his Quintin Freaking Berry second twice in one World Series…”

Okay, so I completely agree with this guy regarding batting the Clap second more than once in a World Series game. The fact that he was anything other than a pinch runner in the playoffs is the most idiotic thing I’ve ever heard (by the way, according to this Berry will go into Spring Training with a chance to earn a roster spot, but with Victor Martinez due back by then Leyland said that they will have a use for a pinch runner – which is exactly why you had Quintin Berry on the roster for the postseason but w/e), but I can’t figure out why there is so much hatred for Leyland. Here are two comments just flat out hating on the guy and I’m not sure how serious they are. I mean they wrote them and there’s no real hint of sarcasm so….I suppose this is what you’d expect from a generally juvenile fan-base who uses the manager as target practice. However, when that manager comments quite often about how the local fans (as well as the media) are always concerned  about what lineup he trots out that’s something to raise your eyebrows at. If he’s commenting on it, he’s annoyed, and it takes quite a bit to make this guy publicly annoyed. Even though, technically  I guess he is killing himself, but isn’t that supposed to make these angry fans happy?

Twitter mention from random handle (perhaps a spammer, not sure)

“@WalkoffWoodward why bring back Perallta when he costs more than the Triple Crown Winner #dumb #idiots

I’m not sure if this was spam or not, so I deleted it from my mentions this afternoon, which is why I didn’t just image paste that in but have no fear I had it memorized to the letter figuring, seriously, this has to be spam, right? Right.Right…

(Peralta will make $6m in 2012, Cabrera will make $21m, so if my math is correct…carry the one…divide by four…yup, Cabrera makes more.)

Comment from random person I know…(yeah, whatever)

“Seriously they brought Dotel back? This guy hates Detroit I mean her’s just a hater and a sore loser.”

So, why did this person react this way when I told them that the Tigers had brought back Dotel on his club option.

“I’m not going to lie to you,” he said as he stood at his clubhouse locker at Comerica Park. “I don’t see that energy in everybody. I just don’t see it. We don’t have it. I’m an honest person. If I don’t see something, I just bring it up.”

Dotel said this to MLB Network following the Game Four loss which sent the Tigers to their kitten grave. I don’t really put any weight on a team’s “fight”. I mean, he was comparing this team to the St. Louis Cardinals team of last year and, well, that team lost to the Giants this year in the NLCS so they must have forgot what that energy felt like.

Or maybe it’s inside Dotel, since you know, he would survive a nuclear Holocaust.

  • cestma

    I read Walkoff Woodward not only because of the good writing, but also because it’s a place where I can avoid that kind of “fan” spluttering (with fans like those I’d hate to see the foes) . Hey, only 2 teams were still playing last week. ‘Nuff said.

  • kevin

    People forget how bad baseball was in Detroit prior to Leyland. Remember the 119 losses in 2003? I do… it was terrible watching a team knowing that they didn’t have a chance to win. So if you want to complain about a World Series loss (or even two World Series losses)… I say… you need to gain a little perspective.

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